Hidden Feelings
by Killer Angel
Summary: COMPLETE: Hermione and Remus are back at Hogwarts! Previously burried andor completely new feelings arise that have them questioning their relationship. My first HGRL fic. Please read and review! I'll love you forever.


Disclaimer: I do not own Hermione, Remus, or any other character or thing or idea related to the Harry Potter world. If you are unaware of the genius that is JK Rowling... then what are you doing here? Oh, and a couple lines of the ending were inspired by a couple lines from "Confessions of a Shopaholic" by Sophie Kinsella.

* * *

_Hidden Feelings_  
  
"Hermione! I'm so glad you could make it here today for our little meeting." The headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry smiled broadly at the beautiful young woman in front of him. He had always felt like she, along with Harry Potter and Ron Weasley, were like grandchildren to him. In the ten or so years since they graduated, however, he'd not seen any of them very often. There was no longer a need for the Order of the Phoenix, as Harry had won the war for the light when he killed Voldemort once and for all in the middle of the trio's seventh year. Needless to say, he grew on to be a successful Auror for the ministry and had little free time. What time he did have was spent with his lovely wife, Ginny, and their two beautiful children.  
  
"Of course, Albus. What did you wish to speak with me about?"  
  
"I am well aware of how much you love your job at the ministry-"  
  
Hermione scoffed at this comment. Her low paying position at the ministry was the most boring job she'd ever had. With her level of intelligence she could probably have done any job she wanted, but it wasn't as simple as that. Even with her being a war hero, it was still harder for a muggle- born to get a job. The new minister, Arthur Weasley, was trying to change that, along with many other acts of discrimination, but you can't change what's in people's heads. Besides, she knew what she really wanted to do. She wanted to be a teacher. But all the positions at Hogwarts were filled. Even the DADA teacher, Professor Lang, was still here after seven years.  
  
Albus continued, "But two of our positions here at Hogwarts have been left open."  
  
Hermione tried valiantly not to let her hopes rise too much. "Who has left, Albus?"  
  
"Our Muggle Studies teacher has decided they wish to retire. With your brilliant mind and muggle blood, I could not think of anyone but you to fill this spot."  
  
Hermione continued trying to hide her excitement, but her eyes showed everything. Albus smiled. He knew she'd be even happier once he told her the rest. He waited for her to ask first. He knew it wouldn't take long for her curiosity to get the better of her. As usual, he was absolutely right.  
  
"Who else is leaving?" She asked.  
  
Albus smiled wider and his eyes twinkled brightly. "I'm afraid Professor Lang has been involved in a bit of a scandal that ended up on the fifth page of the Daily Prophet. The rumors got to her very quickly and she felt the need to lay low for a while. I've already spoken with Remus. With a little bit of persuasion, he's agreed to return as out Defense Against the Dark Arts professor."  
  
"Oh, Albus!" Hermione jumped out of her chair and hugged the old headmaster. She couldn't have been any happier at that moment. The summer after graduation, a bunch of the people who had been in the Order stayed at Grimmauld place for a while. Hermione and Remus got very close. She even developed a bit of a crush on him for a little while. She because as close to him as she was with Harry and Ron. Maybe even closer. But she hadn't seen him much the last couple of years. Now she'd be able to see him every day!  
  
"Does that mean you've accepted the position?" Dumbledore smiled.  
  
Hermione laughed. "When can I move in?  
  
. . .   
  
"Dammit!" Hermione struggled to pick up her big bag again. She was so excited; she'd already dropped it twice. Suddenly, a voice from behind her caused her to drop it once more.  
  
"Would you like some help with that, Miss?"  
  
"Hermione spun around to see her old friend. "Remus!" She shrieked as she threw her arms around him. She pulled back to get a good look at him, and very slowly, feelings that she thought she'd buried long ago were beginning to resurface. The months since she'd last seen him had certainly treated him well. He was just as muscular as ever, but the lines on his face seemed to have disappeared completely. The grey hairs were mostly gone as well, leaving a sandy-brown that looked adorable with his bright blue eyes. He looked much younger than his 47 years. He also looked very, very good.  
  
"Hey, Hermione. How are you?"  
  
"I'm great Remus. She was still grinning madly like the Cheshire Cat. "How are you? You look great!"  
  
"I am, I am. But I'm curious as to why you're trying to carry that big bag when you've got you wand conveniently tucked up your sleeve."  
  
"Well, I'm the muggle studies professor now. Just thought I'd get some practice in." The truth was that she was so excited to be back here, working at Hogwarts, she'd completely forgotten about using magic to make her bagger smaller or lighter.  
  
"Well, wouldn't the muggle thing to do be to ask for help from a big, strong man?" Remus grinned.  
  
"Sure." Hermione replied. "Let me know when you see on." She winked at him.  
  
"Ha. Ha. Ha. Boy, you sure know how to make a guy feel good."  
  
""I'm sorry, Remus." She put on her famous puppy-dog pout. "Remus. Could you please help me with this big, bad, bag that is so immensely large that I can't get it up the stairs and to my rooms?" She batted her eyelashes a couple times for effect.  
  
"No." He laughed at her confused expression. "Of course I will."  
  
He picked up her bag and threw it over his shoulder like it was nothing. Hermione watched his muscles ripple and felt a sudden 'ping' in her stomach. She brushed it away and ran to catch up with Remus.  
  
"Showoff." She teased.  
  
The two of them continued to Hermione's rooms talking and joking along the way.  
  
. . .  
  
Remus was headed back to his own quarters which were down at the other end of the hall. His head was filled with thoughts of Hermione that he was trying very hard to keep out. Thoughts of her perfect body, her welcoming brown eyes, her long and luxurious brown hair. Thoughts of her smile, her laugh, and the way she was making him feel right now. A way he knew he shouldn't be feeling about somebody who was twenty years younger than him. Not to mention one of his closest friends.  
  
When had she gotten to be so gorgeous? Had she always been? How did he not notice before? Why was he noticing now? These questions ran through his mind until he couldn't take it much more. The full moon was only a couple nights away, and he had to get ready for it.  
  
He shook his head as he entered his rooms in an unsuccessful attempt to clear his mind. HE sighed loudly and poured himself a small glass of whiskey. He'd better get over this, whatever it was, very quickly... or it would be a very long and awkward year.  
  
. . .  
  
After Hermione had gotten settled in her rooms, transfiguring her furniture to how she liked it, she went to check out her bathroom. She gasped when she saw the gigantic bathtub with its many taps. Even the Head Girl bath hadn't been this big. She filled it up and slowly climbed in. She laid her head back and let the hot water soothe her tense muscles. As she lay there, her mind began to drift to the werewolf down the hall. Why had these feelings come back now? Hadn't she gotten over her crush years ago? She reached over and turned on the tap with bubble bath. She'd better get over these feelings soon or it would be a very stressful and uncomfortable year.  
  
. . .  
  
The next day, Hermione told Remus that she had recently become an animagus. Unlike his friends, however, she was legally registered. She asked him if he would like her to join him on the nights of the full moon, and he readily agreed to the company. With the wolfsbane potion, he wasn't worried about hurting her, and now he'd have a nice companion. She showed him her form, which was a snowy white wolf with deep brown eyes.  
  
When the full moon arrived, all went according to plan, and they both frolicked together until they got tired and settled down by the fireplace (They were in Remus' quarters). Remus made sure she didn't arrive until after he was fully transformed though. He wasn't ready to have her witness him in his biggest moment of weakness. They both enjoyed the evening and decided that would be the plan each month from then on.  
  
. . .  
  
September first arrived quickly and the students arrived as usual. The first years were sorted, announcements were made, and the great feast began. Hermione was enjoying this new perspective of the Great Hall. She watched the tables and observed all the chatter going on where she used to sit with Harry, Ron, Ginny and the rest of the gang. She glance up and her heart gave a little flutter as Remus rushed in late and sat in the chair next to her. She had not gotten over her feelings, and neither had he. In fact, both of them were falling harder and faster day by day and both were still doing their best to hide it.  
  
. . .  
  
Albus Dumbledore watched them from his seat with a knowing smile and an extra twinkle in his eye. Nothing could be hidden from him. He was finding the tension between two of his favorite people to be very amusing. He knew they'd get together eventually, and he couldn't think of anyone more suited to each other. They were both wonderful and kind people who loved reading and learning. They both were pretty quiet until you really got to know them, and they suddenly became loud and fun. Most importantly, he knew they were both falling in love.  
  
. . .  
  
Snape scowled as he glared in the direction of the two lovebirds. Then he glared at Dumbledore. How could he do that? What was he thinking when he let the know-it-all and the werewolf back into the school? And the two of them were practically salivating all over each other in the middle of the great hall. It was disgusting. He could already tell this was going to be a fucking awful year.  
  
. . .  
  
September passed by quickly, then October, and Hermione and Remus were growing closer and closer. They'd settled easily into their classes and were two of the most loved teachers in the school. This obviously made Snape even more bitter, and as a result, Gryffindor was getting further and further behind in the points department. Hermione and Remus discussed this problem and made a pact to do what they could to rectify it. They gave out points to their old house for the littlest things. One time, Hermione gave Henry Small, a fifth year Gryffindor, five points just for sneezing quietly.  
  
The two of them gave up trying to hide their feelings from themselves, but they continued to hide them from each other. It was getting harder for them every day. By mid-December, they were both head-over-heels in love. Christmas break arrived and most of the students went home for the Holidays. With now classes to teach, Remus and Hermione spent their afternoons together, and often their evenings as well. They played chess, they drank tea, they ate, and they talked. Oh, how they talked! They talked about anything and everything under the sun and the stars.  
  
Hermione knew she couldn't take it much longer. Every second she spent with Remus made her heart hurt more and more. She knew the only way to be sure it wouldn't explode would be to stop spending time with Remus... but she couldn't do that! She'd just have to live with the pain.  
  
What Hermione was unaware of, was the fact that Remus was having similar thoughts and problems. The beautiful muggle-born witch wouldn't get out of his head! Every moment he wasn't with her, he was thinking about her. Even when was sleeping he would dream about her, the kind of dreams he hadn't had since he was seventeen. So far he'd managed to clear her from his mind during his classes, but he wasn't sure he'd be able to do that for much longer.  
  
Even though they were both becoming increasingly uncomfortable and awkward during their meetings in Hermione's rooms for chess, they continued having them. They both hid it well, and neither was willing to stop seeing the other.  
  
One such meeting changed everything.  
  
. . .  
  
"Check." Remus smiled confidently, sure that he'd already had this game won. Hermione struggle to keep her poker-face on as she made her next move.  
  
"Queen to E5." Her queen slid a few spaces to the right before picking up the chair it had previously been attached to and smashing Remus' knight. Hermione finally allowed her smug emotions to show on her face. "Checkmate."  
  
"What!?" Remus searched the board desperately for something he could do.  
  
"I warned you." Hermione teased. I learned from the best chess player on the Chudley Cannons." She was, of course, referring to Ron. He'd become the keeper for his favorite quidditch team after graduation. Since he'd joined, they'd been doing much better. They were now one of the top ten teams in the world.  
  
"Wipe that smirk off you face, Hermione. You look like Snape." Hermione laughed and stuck her tongue out at him. "Very mature. Actually, it's getting late and I should probably head off to bed." It was only around 9:30, but be had to get out of there. Thoughts of what else Hermione could do with that lovely tongue of hers were driving him crazy.  
  
"Alright." Hermione said, trying not to let the disappointment she was feeling show in her voice. Remus got up and started reluctantly towards the door, but as he passed by her chair, he felt the pressure of her small hand on his wrist.  
  
"Wait." She was terrified. Was she really doing this? What if he turned her down? What if he laughed at her? NO. He might turn her down, but he wouldn't laugh at her. That was part of why she loved him.  
  
"What is it?" Remus didn't raise his hopes. She might not be saying what he hoped she was saying.  
  
"I just... Stay. Please." She tried not to sound as desperate as she was. "We could just talk or- or... something." She finished lamely.  
  
Remus stepped closer to her and leaned in a little, allowing her enough space to be comfortable. "Yeah," His voice was huskier than usual. "We could just... talk."  
  
Without knowing who moved first, their lips met in a desperate kiss. When they had to stop for breath, they looked at each other and smiled, before their lips met again, this time more loving and tender. In an unspoken agreement, they both began to back towards her bedroom and as Remus laid her carefully down onto her red satin sheets, he began to slowly unbutton her shirt. He kissed his way up to her ear, where he whispered softly: "I love you." He captured her lips again so she wouldn't feel like she had to respond. Hermione would have none of that, though. She broke away for a small moment and smiled up at him with tears of happiness beginning to form in her eyes and make them sparkle in the dim lighting.  
  
"I love you, too."

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A/N: I'm sorry if you didn't think that was good. I wrote it entirely during driver's ed when the videos began getting boring and repetitive (which was pretty much right away.) I still got a 97% on the test though! I still have to take the driving part. Bum, bum, bum. IT is the longest thing I've ever written! LOL. 5 and a half pages on word... that's still not very long. Oh well. Anyway, I just felt like writing something and I figured since I'd already done a Sirius/Hermione, a Severus/Hermione.... It was finally time for a Remus Hermione. (  
  
Please let me know what you thought by leaving a review! It'll make my whole day! Please... 


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